CHAPTER FOUR

The bruises on my heart hurt more than any wound ever could, I didn’t want to get out of bed. Not today, not after everything that happened yesterday.

But life doesn’t stop for heartbreak. Not even the kind that tears your soul in two. The morning light was shining through the blinds like it was a good day to be alive. It painted soft gold lines across the floor, but nothing about this day felt golden.

It felt gray.

I rolled onto my side, burying my face into the pillow, hoping I could somehow melt into the mattress and disappear, I hadn’t spoken to anyone since the rejection.

Not that anyone came looking for me. Heck after school I don't even speak to anyone.

Moments like that should come with support, shouldn’t they? With someone, anyone offering a shoulder or a soft word. But no one did. Not even the teachers. They just watched it happen, just like they always watched.

I finally pulled myself out of bed, my limbs heavy like they were made of stone. Every step i took felt like dragging a very big suitcase behind me. I splashed cold water on my face, trying to wash away the redness around my eyes, but it only seemed to make me look worse.

I looked… dead.

When I stepped into the academy, the hallway was filled with whispers. It was worse than before. They all laughed as they spoke within themselves while looking at me, guess who they were talking about.

Me.

I kept my head down and tried to move quickly, but the minute I passed the lockers near the cafeteria, I heard Annie's voice.

“Oh look, it’s the rejected little mutt.”

Of course, she was standing with two other girls, Melissa and Tasha, her faithful servants who only laughed when she laughed and hated whoever she hated.

“Hey Lyra,” Annie called out mockingly. “Still waiting for your wolf to show up? Or is she just as embarrassed by you as your mate was?” They both started laughing even though it wasn’t funny.

My stomach twisted, but I didn’t respond.

I kept walking.

“Ronan probably threw up after you left,” Melissa chimed in. “I mean, can you blame him? No wolf, no looks, no rank. You're like... the trifecta of horrible and useless.”

The words stung more than they should have. But it wasn’t the first time they'd said them. Just the first time it cut this deep.

Because now, it was true.

I had been rejected because I wasn’t worth it.

By my own mate.

Annie wasn’t finished though. She stepped forward, blocking my path. Her eyes glittered with cruelty.

“You know what I think?” she said, her voice sugary sweet. “I think the Moon Goddess gave you a mate just so you’d know what it feels like… before ripping it away. How pathetic is that?”

My hands curled into fists at my sides.

I wasn’t going to cry.

Not here.

Not in front of her.

I pushed past her without a word, but as I rounded the corner, someone shoved me from behind. Hard.

My books spilled out of my bag and scattered across the floor.

Laughter roared through the hallway.

I dropped to my knees, heart pounding, vision blurry with unshed tears as I scrambled to gather my things. A foot came down hard on my notebook, crumpling the page.

“I think you dropped your pride too, mutt,” someone snickered.

My fingers trembled as I picked everything up. I didn’t look at them. I couldn’t.

When I finally made it to class, I sat in the farthest corner, shrinking into myself. My name was whispered across the room like a dirty secret. No one sat beside me. The seat next to mine had been empty for years. Like my presence came with a plague.

I used to dream of my first shift. I imagined how it would feel, like being set free.

Now, I wasn’t even sure if I’d ever shift.

Maybe I really was broken.

Wolf-less.

Useless.

At lunch, I didn’t eat. My appetite had vanished the moment Ronan’s eyes had turned cold.

Instead, I found a bench behind the sports field, far from the others. I sat there alone, staring at my hands, willing them to stop shaking.

The silence was heavier than ever.

And for the first time, I started to believe it.

That maybe… I deserve this.

Maybe the Moon Goddess made a mistake giving me a mate.

Maybe Ronan saw something in me that confirmed what everyone else already knew, that I wasn’t enough. That I never had been. I can't even get my wolf so how could I be a Luna?

---

After school, I walked home slowly, dragging my feet like I wanted the earth to swallow me. But the universe wasn’t that merciful.

When I reached the porch, there was no one waiting.

No family.

No wolf.

No warmth.

Just the same cold house, the same cold silence.

I took a long shower and sat on the bathroom floor, the steam curling around me like a fog.

I pulled my knees to my chest and let the tears fall.

I didn’t bother wiping them away.

That night, I dreamed of him.

Ronan.

Not the one who rejected me.

But the one who looked at me, just for a moment, like I meant something.

Like I could’ve been someone, if only fate had chosen better.

And when I woke up, the ache in my chest was worse than before.

Because even in my dreams, I wasn’t enough to be loved.